Giving Thanks

Now that we are pregnant I cant help but think about what kind of parents JCH and I will be and it makes me nostalgic about my childhood and how I was raised.  Nostalgia sets in strong Thanksgiving morning.  Even though I'm not waking up to my mom baking with the parade in the background and me and my 3 crazy sisters running around in our pj's and fighting for the bathroom I still had an irresistible urge to repeat history and follow traditions.  So yesterday when I woke up I tuned into the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade and started to make JCH and I breakfast.  As I cooked I reflected over the past few months and cried (hormones) in disbelief at how lucky we've been and was overwhelmed with the many things we have to be thankful for (yes I'm about to get sappy).

As with each year I am thankful for the wonderful people I call family.  JCH and I have started working on this creative writing exercise where we write down "My mom always..." and "My mom never..." (and also dad) and then we talk about what we had written down and decide together how that has shaped us and why we would like to be that way (or not) for our children.  Among the many ways I hope to be like my mom there are some unique traits that I feel compelled to share.  My mother always let us play and get dirty, just like kids should.  My mom always cooked "from scratch meals" and tried very hard to interest us in cooking with her (making it a family event).  My mom gave us freedom to make our own decisions (but a solid foundation that she could trust we wouldn't let her down).  My mom always tickled our feet to wake us up in the morning (yes it drove me crazy) with the smell and promise of a delicious breakfast (totally made up for it).  My mom pinched our cheeks and called us "stinky butt" or would sing our name in a strange rhymey made up song (casey-casey, bo-basey, banana-fana foe-fasey, me, mye, moe, masey, casey)...it sounds silly but just typing that song makes me miss my mom.  I could definitely keep going but the point is that she had so much fun being a mom and that button never switched off.  She took us everywhere, let us do cartwheels down the isles at the grocery store and spoiled us with love, affection and gifts and she has shaped me into the goofy, outgoing, care-free, compassionate and open-minded person that I am today.  My puppy already has the nickname "stinky butt" and I regularly call my mom for a recipe when I'm looking to impress JCH or a house guest.  I'm thankful for my mommy.

Small mention of my "3 crazy sisters"...but they have shaped me and for that I am thankful.  My older sister always having to play babysitter but still always maintaining the "cool older sister" role.  Every once in while she would allow me to tag along and boy would I learn something.  From watching her friends play "7 minutes in heaven" when I was 10 to sneaking me out to my first party when I was 15 (sorry mom) she always let me "watch and learn" which I think helped me make good decisions when it came my turn.  The other "middle sister" who is only 1 year younger was my best friend growing up (though I didn't know it at the time).  Her and I had some wild adventures as kids.  She was the "always available" friend (she couldn't help it-she was my sister).  From turning bath time into hurricanes for our barbies, to riding our bikes around town eating apples off trees and getting dirty in creeks.  We had a lot of "good old fashioned fun" and got ourselves into some serious pickles... and I distinctly remember feeling as though I was responsible for taking care of her.  The baby in our family is almost 10 years younger than me so we have a very dynamic relationship.  We didn't really grow up fighting over who got the front seat (in the car) or who got to play with the blond barbie.  I got to drive her to sleep-overs and teach her about make-up, boys and fashion.  It was so much fun to watch her transition into a young woman and to be an active part in her development.  I take pride in who my baby sister is today and feel a sense of accomplishment as though I had something to do with it.  I'm thankful for my sisters.

It was "love at first site" with my mother-in-law.  JCH is her only child and she was definitely attentive to his needs, convinced of his potential, proud of his accomplishments, interested by his friends and lifestyle, and committed to his growth and development.  100% of her was put into him (and still is).  She is the most supportive and caring mother and is the reason JCH is a very confident and successful man today.  Because of JCH I am lucky enough to have her in my life now too (and for those of you who know her...I know you agree).  Because JCH has cystic fibrosis (and because his parents are so attentive to him) they planned early on to help him with making a family one day.  I have them to thank for the glorious bun in my oven.  Without them we could only dream of financing what we have already gone through to get pregnant.  Money aside, my mother-in-law has treated me as her own from day one.  She is truly the most caring and giving person I have ever met.  She has been such an instrumental part of my life (and marriage) since I met her and I couldn't have asked for (or dreamed up) a better mother-in-law.  I am thankful for my mother-in-law.

I don't mean to discredit the men in my family as they have also shaped who I am, and are equally as fabulous.  My father made me a fighter and a dreamer and to believe that I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.  My step-dad gave us a strong routine and structure and help shape me into a tidier person (I'm naturally kind of a slob).  My father-in-law is a man of few words but always has extraordinary advice and interesting stories.  His life experiences and kind heart allow for such a wonderful expression of knowledge and guidance.  His dry sense of humor that he passed onto JCH has to be one of my favorite things about both of them.  My wonderful husband.  I think most of y'all know by know that my heart couldn't beat without him.  We share every aspect of our lives together and I wouldn't have it any other way. I am thankful for my husband and I am thankful for the men in my life.

I'm also very thankful for my extended family, all of mine an JCH's aunts/uncles and cousins who have also helped shaped us.  AND my even more extended family-my friends.  I'm thankful for TS who inspired me to write this blog and who always inspires me to be a better person...and ML who has nurtered me emotionally through this whole process and has been a strong influence on the kind of person I strive to be...and AP who has held my hand and my heart this past year and helped keep me sane...and MF and KK for guiding me to living a more fullfilled life. There are so many of y'all (family, friends and readers) that I am thankful for that I could write a novel (I nearly have already) and I hope you know how blessed I feel that you are a part of our lives.

Without our families shaping us into who we are, both JCH and I wouldn't be the perfectly odd, ambitious, adventurous, committed, and happy couple that we are today.  I'm thankful for my family and thankful that both JCH and I have such a wonderful foundation to build our own happy family. 

Happy (belated) Thanksgiving (I started to write this yesterday-in light of my nostagia but my overwhelming tiredness took over and my afternoon and evening naps won that battle).

My sister posted this to fb today-what perfect timing!